And then it was 1... oh clock!

Hey there... blog... it really has been a while...
Like over 4 months....
So. Since this is an insight to my thoughts and to music I guess I'll just let the juices flow...
I'm writing this as I'm laying in bed at 1am, about to go to sleep late to wake up early... maybe. 
The best part of this night is the crickets chirping out the window, it's like a strange eerie and yet soothing sound. Lately it seems like life has been so rushed and so crazy, like I'm in the eye of a tornado that was created by a small child spinning a spoon in a glass of water. At times the spiral is spinning and spinning and the cup runs over and then other times the child is tired so the spoon is lazily spinning along and it seems that my music taste has adapted to that style. Currently my favorite song is a toss up between Raise your Weapon (Noisia Remix) by Deadmau5 and Scary Monsters and Nice Sprites by Skrillex but both of these songs are crazy dubstep heavy beat techno. It seems that lately all I can do is get lost in the heavy strumming and intricate beats, the mind bending synthesizers and the scant singing. But then in the times where I'm just spinning lazily I've been listening to a lot of classical? I'm not sure what to call it but just songs that have deep and soulful stringed instruments and passionate piano, songs that pull out your soul, wrench out your deepest emotions and leave you raw inside (I know that sounds painful, but the good kind of life changing pain)... lol
but I guess that's the kind of music you would expect me to listen to these days.
It seems like whenever life gets crazy you just want to feel, feel something bigger and even greater than yourself to know that school isn't everything, that your life wasn't solely made for Physics or engineering Statistics. 
It's been wicked encouraging though to see how constant God is through all of this and yet how He is the driving force for half of the madness. :)
Lately, I've begun to see a lot of the things that I desperately need to change in my walk with God and with those changes come crazy hard challenges. Like the challenge to give up all control and just trust in God...
man.
Just thinking about doing that is scary, yet why would I want to control my own life when I can barely do my Physics homework AND the God that created the whole world (including Physics) wants to look out for my best interest.... so, really? Why do I even want to be in control?
But... this post is getting too philosophical for my brain and I think I need some sleep... haha
This was a bit stream of consious and may have been a bit much... I'll try to make it lighter next time...
but remember... it could've been worse :D

I was drowned in the sea...

Blog. oh. yeah. I have one of those... sorry I have been totally neglecting it... my one word excuse is: FINALS... the sea of finals... :\
I really do love them and I hate them at the same time... They're good measures of progress but terrible methods for relieving stress haha
So, I'm sitting in the airport now waiting for my flight and I've taken the time to people watch.
It's quite fun, and really insightful; to really look at people with no assumptions and to wonder how their life is
There's an old Indian (from India) couple sitting beside me that was on the same flight that I was on earlier and they are so unique. They look as thought they've seen struggles in life but they, at the same time, hold a youthful edge.
There's the next Eminem sitting a row in front of me, with his large dark shades, and graphic hat and slightly baggy jacket. I am wont to assume that he is just a psuedo gangster... yet really thinking, he could be someone who doesn't fit into his presence surroundings so he keeps changing, like a chameleon until he finds the right rhythm for his own beat. I mean, who am I to say that a style does not fit someone or that someone does not belong....
OH. I'm gonna take a break in my "insightful" thinking to share my newest found favorite awkward situations
:)
At the airport for my first flight I saw a guy who was in my math class last semester, we had met before so I thought that when He saw me we'd exchange a slight nod and maybe a few words... no such luck, instead, we spent the majority of the time waiting for the flight stealing glances at eachother... I cant imagine what was running through his head but I was thinking: should I say hi? Jesus would talk to him.... But I was also kind of taken aback, I mean, he was the one who didnt say hi to me, I was patiently waiting to do the whole "hey how's it going?" head nod...
but it gets better!
As I'm about to get in line to board the plane I notice that he -let's call him Tim since I dont know his name- is sleeping pretty soundly as they are boarding the plane... Inside I wrestle with waking him up or seeing if he will get up by himself... I think I sent a slightly distressed look to the man sitting next to Tim because he was kind enough to wake Tim up... But then, when I get in line to board the plane, who else would be in line behind me but Tim! and when we get to the front to get our tickets scanned who else would have the same layover and second flight as me but Tim!!
Unluckily, we did not sit next to eachother, although it would've been swell. I would've reached out to him...
By over the shoulder snooping... no, I'm not a creep, I'm an opportunist for God... I found out that we're not sitting nex to eachother on the next flight, which is another bummer... But I have faith that I will somehow I'll reach out to him haha
yeah. I'm not sure what else to type here..
Oh, if you ever find yourself studying for a Differential Equations exam here are some things you'll need:
A whiteboard and WORKING dry erase markers
Hilarious yet focused study buddies
Techno, lots of techno (like Dubstep or the bloody beetroots)
and if you have time, check out the song, Barefoot Pilgrims by Balmorhea
Happy Living! :D
oh, I forgot to mention, I'm on my way to an interview! Wish me luck :)

Life is Like a Lime....

Today was pretty great. and it's not even over yet.
I have a swollen lip from gettting hit in he face by a light up frisbee... you think I would've seen it coming... But, it could be worse. I could've had no arms and still had to stop the frisbee... for the entire game. and anyway, that happened yesterday, I just thought that I'd tell everyone so they can stare at the swelling :)
Anyway,
this post is about the weather, and how odd it is. Instead of listening to music I'm listening to the wind rush past my closed window, pretty much the best sound... Even though fighting like a man beating the air has a negative connotation, I literally did just that to get to class today because the wind was so intense...
and apparently there is a crazy thunder storm that is supposed to happen... The kids at the college next door were warned not to take showers because the lightening can allegedly go though the water...
yep...
Soo...Today I was posed a very interesting question. A question that came from a book:
Why do I want the Holy Spirit?
If you're not a christian and reading this read Romans 8 first...
But, thinking about it now, it shouldn't be why want Him but rather, why I need Him.
You know that feeling that you get when you watch an epic action adventure movie, or listen to a crazy instense took alot of talent to create song or listen to a gutwrenching motivational speech? That yearning to do something so much greater and so much more epic and meaningful with your life? yep? Well, you can only acheive that something greater with the Holy Spirit. I realized that I need the Holy Spirit in order to live life the way that God calls me to live it, the way He planned it out for me. Wouldn't you rather save people's lives than climb Mt. Kilimanjaro (even though that would be epic...)? With God, and having the Holy Spirit, I can change lives and through that change, I can change the world... but when I say I, I really mean God :)
So yeah, the answer to that question is because I want to do epic things with my life, epic things that fly off the charts for the human standards of greatness.

Sometimes I Pretend I'm a Hipster.

It begins on a mile long stretch of road. A road that I bus often, and walk even more often. A stretch that symbolizes a friendship, or three because it's the path I take to escape from my cramped dorm room, to enter into a cozy apartment filled with amazing friends. It's funny, it seems that it's only on this piece of road that I walk and feel like a hipster.
I roll up my jeans, pop in my headphones and walk with a swagger that catches the beat of my music and the force of my ideas. I like listen to really obscure instrumental music with more soul in a fiddle than the Harlem Renaissance and more passion in the voice than Obama's speeches.
Today, I listened to The Drought by a band called Horse Feathers. This is pretty much my favorite song, and even though it's slow, it makes me feel so alive and energetic.
As I walked, I took snapshots of the street and pictures of my reflection in glass doors. I kept thinking, man, I hope I look as cool as I walk, half singing the tunes and sminling at the trees and the sun.
But then I realize how selfish these thoughts are.
It doesnt matter how cool I look, struttin' down the road. What matters is how cool I look, in the hard situations. When my faith is being tested and I'm so afraid of doing God's will. So, I'm grateful that I can have this realization now, looking back on that walk, and, all of the walks I've had, because they really could've been worse: instead of just not having arms, I could not know God and have to spend my life chasing after the things that make me seem hipster cool while losing sight of the perpetual joy I have in God, the joy that, when all of the indie angst wears away, still shines brighter than the sun...

Bird Chirps and Finding Wisdom in Procrastination

So...
I'm writing this post as I'm sitting outside hanging out in the cool air with a friend. A crazy friend.
We came out here to get homework done and yet here is a list of all the things that we have accomplished:
breaking bread
feeeding birds (it's so epic I needed another e)
laying and marveling at God and the sky
doing a handstand
taking webcam pics of eachother and trees and the sky <----- by far the best!
all while listening to epic music

So, as you can see, there hasn't been much work done. But. It could be worse.
We spent the last hour enriching our souls and fellowshipping, basking in God's glory and finding joy in the simplest of things, and though work has to be done, school is not the only thing we're living for... not even half of what we're living for.This morning I read an amazing scripture: 1 Cor 2:10b ~ "The Spirit searches all things, even the deep things of God." According to Jesus' promise I have that Spirit in me. SO I need to take full advantage of Him and listen when He guides and prompts me in order to live each day out to its fullest potential.

Opera. and the other Finer things of Life.

So, as the first post, I thought that I should write about something momentous... but, this really isn't. It's just an experience that I had today and decided to share.
Opera.
I went to a friend of a friend's senior recital tonight and it was pretty great.
The first thing that I thought was, woah, this is intense singing. Although, I wouldn't classify it as the best.
Not that she wasn't an exceptional singer, she was. 
As I was sitting there I was thinking, Opera! What a strange and yet wonderful noise! but, I was also wondering if my ears were beginning to bleed or if I was entering into the inner sanctum of enlightenment while my soul was beginning come to life! Experiencing that kind of raw talent coupled with a piano and a very timed page turner was amazing and yet saddening; it made me think of all of the things that technology has marred, and all the things that it will continue to change... newspapers, paperback books, childhoods filled with roaming the woods and playing on jungle gyms...
But!
Jesus is Lord, and for that I am grateful.
So, it could be worse...
I could have no arms. and still have to write this post...